Grumble, grum
Saturday, a week and a day unemployed and no positive lead yet. I mean, things aren’t all bad (Liana finished typing over the book) but they could be better. New month tomorrow, that means new rent and that means getting my ass in gear and getting myself some work.
A couple of days ago a friend contacted us about some possible cash in hand work, which would be great as that is the only type of work that Banana can actually do over here. I should know better by now, but I actually got my hopes up, to have them dashed when the friend of the friend barely even talked to us, but directly pushed us on to the bar manager, who then went on to say the familiar ‘there are changes going on, so things are a bit uncertain.’
Oh well, we’ve got six months left and then we have to get out. So that means I’ll probably have to find a job and a half for that time. That’s ok though, seeing as there will be an end in sight and I’ll be working with a definite goal in mind, get us off this god forsaken rock. I think I’m turning anti socialist. Scary thought, huh? It’s true though, I can’t stand the protectionist measures that socialist governments have towards their population. In this time of the supposed ‘shrinking world’ and global village governments seem to be actively working to make it harder for foreigners to enter their markets and get employment visas.
The only reason for that is, of course, democracy. How do I mean? Well people are scared to loose their jobs, they have an irrational fear of people coming in from outside and taking their jobs away. (none thinking to themselves ‘oh, but more entrepreneurs might create job growth’). So they vote for governments that protect the workers in their own market, even if this protectionism does not benefit the market in the long run. Socialist governments are more protectionist, so I’m starting to dislike socialism.
Bugger, now I dislike all government models. Of course it isn’t really the fault of the governments, they just naturally say what the people want to hear (democracy, again). It’s the fault of the under educated voting population. It’s the fault of the village mentality that prevails, to this day in rural areas. Protect your family, protect your neighbours and hate anybody that comes from further away then the next valley.
We’ve been talking about making our way to Europe, somehow. At least there I’ll be able to get a full time job without too much trouble. Then we just have to worry about getting Banana her Visa. Banana wants to see London, but you have to be pretty damned sure you can be employed within two weeks before you try your luck there.
I don’t really want to go back to Holland, myself. Even if most of my family is there. The Dutch have this annoying habit, where they expect a Dutch person to speak Dutch, even if another language of theirs is better and they look down on anybody that doesn’t. It’s a lovely place to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live there. Of course beggars can’t be choosers, so we’ll see what happens. For some reason I reckon we might still be trapped here for another six months.
Two and a half jobs, that’s the answer. Or somebody that is willing to advance me a whole load of money on my short story bundle. That would be even better. All that’s left is to work as hard as we can and hope for a miracle to help make everything that bit easier. Of course, sometimes you can help bring about your own miracles.
Ish
It’s going to be a drag having no regular Internet access again. As a matter of fact, that’s really going to piss me off. Everything takes four times as long when you don’t have the internet. That includes learning new things.
I’m hoping I’ll manage to find a way around all of this, cause I don’t want to cut off my connection with the outside world, yet again. For one thing my blog would suffer and I’m starting to enjoy writing here more and more. It certainly becomes easier as you go along. In the beginning you have to think about every entry you write, then slowly you get more and more used to it, until finally you just sit down and get everything out on paper before you really know what hits you.
I can’t even phantom what I wrote like back in the beginning. I should really find some time to read back through everything I wrote. No doubt there would be entries there that would provoke more thought. Half-baked ideas that would do well with some more time in the oven of my mind.
Maybe I can find something that would do well for my third short story (just started in on my second one, I already had a good idea for that). I’ve got this little RL book that I consult for ideas (when ever I think I have a really good idea I write it in there in a few pages), but most of them wont do real well for short stories. They are far to difficult and intricate to tell in just a few pages.
I’m really wandering around today, aren’t I? It’s probably because Fish and Banana are rattling away in close proximity and I can’t complete a single thought, let alone a complete sentence. Oh well, as Banana just said: ‘you got to work with what you got’ and nothing I’ve heard today can be truer than that.
You’ve got to work with what you’ve got, even if it isn’t very much. The trick is making what you’ve got more, so that then you’ve got more to work with. I’m not terribly good at that trick right now. I don’t even have a permanent Internet connection. Too expensive at fifty bucks a month.
I had very few expectations when I came to Australia. One was to be united with Banana, that one went all right. The second was to set up a good life for the two of us and that one could use a little work. I think the same thing is getting me into trouble over here as in Singapore. I’m just no good at putting my head down, putting my blinkers on and grinding away, how ever much I might dislike what I’m currently doing. Of course that would all not be a problem if I could actually find somebody that is willing to pay me money for doing something that I actually enjoy.
I know, I know. That’s the dream, isn’t it? That’s what we all aspire to find. A job that isn’t like a job, yet puts tons of cash in your pocket and tons of friends by your side. A job that only requires exactly as many hours of work as you’re willing to put into it.
I think its partially my many dreams that make it so hard to just put my head down. But then, it is my dreams that make me me, so what do you do? Same as always, I guess, comprimise. I’m reading ‘Porno’ by Irving Welsh right now and he puts it down something like this ‘if the eighties was the ‘me’ generation, and the nineties was the ‘it’ generation then this is the ‘-ish’ generation.’
Dreams become Dreamish, goals become Ghoulish and the self is replaced by the Selfish. Black and white are out of the window, replaced by a set of scales, created by psychologists who admit themselves that Psychology isn't a hard science, but is kind of softish. The softish glow of our own self deception, wrapped around us, like the emperor's new clothes and about just as warming when the cold hard truth settles on us that we're no happier now then we were before and that all our progress has just pushed us closer to the brink of extinction.
Money
Yesterday I was informed by my boss that the person who was doing VOIP in his company handed in his resignation this week, meaning that, by default, my job has been made redundant for the moment. I can’t sell a product that the company no longer has, right? Does that mean the end of my job? That is not yet clear, bot for the moment it has been put on hold, meaning I’ll have to do some serious searching (be it either in soul or world) about what’s next.
Banana Super Hero Girl did not react too well to the news. Not that she screamed, or scratched or did anything else offensive towards me (after all, it wasn’t my fault) instead she just sort of, well, deflated. Her mood went on a steady decline and her spirit to a low point. Poor girl is having a tough time of it right now.
Fortunately we managed to arrest this slide this morning with a good talk about how she was doing and how we were doing. The second question is the more interesting one for this article, because we aren’t actually doing all that badly. We’re getting on top of things (even if it is a bit slow) and getting our problems under control. We have more spending money then we did a few months ago and, though the excitement of a new place is wearing off a bit, things are still good. That managed to perk her up a bit. After that we vigorously cleaned the house and that put us both back on track.
So now we’re sitting in a netcafe, typing away and planning. What we’re planning, we’re not quite sure of, but it involves either finding a way for Banana to work here or elsewhere. Of course right now she is working (typing out the book), though admittedly that is only short-term work. First things first though, I need a job.
So I’ve decided to ramp up my attempts at selling my short story and will be scouring the Internet for publishers and information about that. I have recently come to the conclusion that my most marketable skill is my creativity and my ability to write. That is, therefore, what I need to work my pants off doing. Creating creative stories and then writing them down.
The responses I’ve got so far to my short story have been very positive and I would start sending it off to publishers straight away, if I wasn’t afraid of them nicking the thing and laughing in my face (always a frightening prospect). On that note, Patricea I’ll be sending you an updated copy right after I’ve put this post up (and after updating it, of course).
If I do manage to get a book deal out of somebody somewhere then we’ll probably be leaving Australia. Beautiful country, but the government is way too obstructive for us. To anybody planning to move to Australia, make sure you have everything sorted out before you get here, because sorting things out over here is nigh on impossible (and very expensive).
On a side note and in response to Nighty Knight of Tentacles, no blogging is not a popularity contest. Popularity is, on the other hand, useful for advertising purposes. (this one is courtesy of
Patricea who has it on her blog). Google is willing to
pay us for advertising done via our blogs and every little bit of extra income is attractive, right? Every click on one of their ads makes us a little bit of money and though I accept that that will probably not be too much, every little bit helps.
Just thought I would share that with everybody (though I’m sure most of you already knew about it), so that everybody can potentially benefit from this source of revenue.
One
Everybody always says that one person can't make a difference. I'm sure you've heard it. You're talking to somebody and you're getting really worked up about something and then they go and deflate your bubble by saying something like 'yeah, but one person can't make a difference'. They might say it about voting, or about a new idea, or about something you vehemently disagree with in politics.
Today I will try to show why that sentence is so much rubbish and that people that say it should be smacked in the back of the head. Except for the obvious self defeatism of that statement, it is also complete bullox. One person can make a world of difference and, in fact, it has always been one person (albeit different people in each instance) that have made all the differences in this world.
Pretty daring statement, yes? Well, its meant to be. Now for the proof. Every idea, every revolution, every invention, every discovery, every war, every book, every fad was originally thought of by one person. One person, somewhere, going 'yeah, but what if...' You don't think its true? It has to be true. Until we can absolutely prove the existence of telepathy we have to accept that our thoughts are our own, meaning that every thing revolutionary idea is voiced by one person somewhere.
Every single one. It is one person who starts bringing like minded people together to affect change. It is one person who comes up with the breakthrough idea that changes the course or research. It is one person who voices the winning strategy. It is always one.
Don't get me wrong, most great things are accomplished in groups, with thousands if not millions of people involved. Yet even then it is one person who changes the route that that group takes and it is one person (and only one) who has the original idea that turns into a world altering event.
Other people might add to the crucible that is the mind, but the breakthrough must come from one mind. Every single revolution starts with one person saying 'I'm not taking it any longer' and uniting others behind them. Hell, that person might actually unite others in front of him (he doesn't make good leadership material), but he will still be the originator.
It is such bullox when people say that one person can't make a difference, and I say, don't let yourself be brought down by that. Nothing ever starts big. Everything starts with one and then either expands slowly or blows up in no time at all.
Just like every rich person was at one time poor or had a poor ancestor who then made the money that makes that person rich today. Every revolutionary was at one time only known by two people, her mum and her dad (and she pooped her pants too!).
Everything starts out with one. We start out as one cell, ideas start out from one thought, revolutions start with one person, change starts with one man or woman. Don't ever let anybody say that one person can't make a difference. Every single things (and I mean every single thing) that we've achieved in this world was originally the work of one. Even if you're alone, sometimes that's enough.
Link stealing and watching
Somehow, somebody managed to add my sitemeter counter to their blog. The
cheap bastards. Trying to coast of the fact that I have a few thousand hits and he has none. I've asked them kindly to alter or remove their counter, but so far it has had little result. I wouldn't really care about it, but for the fact that his hits are somehow being added onto my own.
Now that sucks, as I want my counter to show me how many people visit my site. Not my site and his. I can't really be bothered to care whether he needs to make himself look good by have his site counter show my hits, but I don't like it that the people that visit him influence my counter!
It's just plain rude! So if any of you have the time, leave rude comments on his blog, so that he'll change his mind and start using his own counter. Cheeky bugger.
For the rest I have little to report, so instead I'll explain how
Technorati works, since all of yous seem to have trouble with it. Ok, Technorati tracks all the blogs on the Internet (well, almost all, or a good chunk) and what links they refer to. So, if you're interested to find out how many people have linked to a specific site, or address, then its just a simple matter of filling in that site or address.
How do you do that? Well, the easiest way is to load up the page you want to view in one window, then copy the full address (including the http part) and post it in that little white box that appears in the middle of the Technorati page.
Technorati will then look through its database, to discover if anybody has linked to that site. So how can you use technorati? Well, lets say you think you found something new and interesting on the Internet, but you're not sure how many other blogs have already mentioned it. Just type in the address of this new and interesting thing and bobs your uncle. The more links, the more blogs have discussed this phenomenon.
Or, you can keep track of how people (actively) like what you're writing on or about by how many people link to your blog.
Nighty Knight of Tentacles, for instance, is linked to 74 times by 55 sources. While
Liana Banana Super Hero Girl is linked to 9 times by 9 different sources. While I have to make do with 8 links for 8 sources (sniff). (
Patricea has sixteen from sixteen.)
So does this measure your popularity? Partially, though I imagine it also has something to do with how many sites you personally link and how specific you write about something that interests a lot of people. The more actively you engage unknown outsiders, the more people look at your blog and the better the chances of expanding your linkage and therefore your readership.
Of course that only matters if you actually want to expand your readership, which was not what I started this post out explaining. I started out explaining technorati, and I think I did alright with that.
PS: Patricea, I'll get you a copy ASAP. Glad to see you're interested (oh, and I wrote for Expat magazine as well, I would just like to add. Seven months, every month.)
Meta Writing
Ah, apparently my last post provoked some reactions. I wonder why? Or was it more of a coincidence, where people thought 'oh, let's say something' at the same time. Never mind, I'm being far too analytical again, right?
Ok, first off Boobsie Loobsie. Yes, you're right, it does need two Os. I conferred with Banana and she agrees with you. I thought about it yesterday, but thought one would suffice at the time. I was wrong and I will punish myself with the cat'o'nine tails tonight. The point you were trying to make is also clear (before you think I'm thick as a big slice of chocolate cake with fudge on top).
As for your pictures Pactricea, I'll be sure that Banana looks at them (and myself as well). Chilling out, I might add, is our middle name. We just like to bluster and belch on about other people's poor writing skills. Try to push ourselves up, if you get what I mean. Make ourselves feel better. (Putting others down raises yourself right up! I know that's mean and nasty, but hey, sometimes we all have to resort to the lowest common denominator.)
Nighty Knight with Tentacles, (are you hiding under my bed?) I know where you're coming from, but in this case I have to disagree. I imagine that it might be hard to explain what I disagree with, seeing as I can't just duplicate part of her work here (and wont, even if I could) and you therefore have no point of reference, but trust me, this would annoy the piss out of a cactus, or a sun baked rock, or what ever is funnier.
I mean, I hope for her sake that the work will not have been done in vain and that the book gets published. Everybody should try and get something published. I just know that if it comes out I won't buy it. That's alright, though, cause I'm not the target audience, I suspect.
The question I keep asking myself, however, is who is the target audience? Who is this book being written to? (I feel a piece of writing should be written towards a person, or a group of people. It makes certain you stick to the 'plot' better and keep the style similar throughout.)
On that note, I've finished a short story which is being well received so far, by the people that have read it. I won't be posting it up here, as I actually want to get the bastard published, rather then randomly scattered across the Internet for free (I've noticed that Bloggers and Internet users are notoriously bad at obeying plagiarism laws).
Now all that is left for me to do is find somebody who wants to pay me for my writing, so if any of you know publishers who are interested in either single short stories or short story bundles, then do drop us a line. I will honestly admit that I had actually expected to be paid for the short story. Unfortunately, expectation is the mother of all fuck ups, but hey.
Oh, if you do want a copy of the short story (for your personal reading pleasure, or because you want to see if I'm 'worthy' of suggesting to a publisher friend) drop us a line as well and I'll possibly send you a copy.
While we're on that tact, you can drop me a line for any other reason, as well. Yes, I'm generous that way.
Oh yeah, and congratulations to Loobse Boobsie for getting a job! Hurrah and the whole rest of it (if you want to read more about boobsie's job exploits go to
his site, where his lamentations and tribulations are spelled out in full. (with double Os, even).)
Rambling about Ramblings
Poor Banana Superhero Girl is going crazy. She's typing out a book for Fish's mother in law and it is driving her absolutely up the wall. She's spending a few hours a day typing away at it and another hour complaining, groaning and rolling her eyes about what she is typing. It would be quite funny if it weren't for the fact that I get to be the target of most of the complaints, groans and eye rolling.
I can understand where she is coming from, though. I try to help her out by typing an hour or so a day (I try, anyway, its come to about two or three hours a week) and it drives me absolutely up the wall as well. Its like the woman is constantly on drugs while she is writing the book. Missing words, sentences and punctuation marks a plenty. She also has, as yet, not figured out some of the most basic rules of grammar and spelling. For instance 'your' and 'you're' is always written as your. Variations of there are also always written as there and so forth.
I mean, I realise that my grammar isn't the best in the world and I do make the 'occasional' mistake (especially with then and than), but she just takes the cake (and eats it to!).
What has annoyed me the most, however, is the character's conversations. Till now in the ten or so pages that I've typed I have not been confronted with one normal conversation. In every single conversation you just have to wander if the participants are even talking to each other at all, or if there is another unwritten party talking back to them, whom they are responding to.
Then there is the way she does conversations. Basically they are exercises of the 'he said, she said' variety. Not just once or twice, mind you, but this woman will gladly write 'he said, she said' about fifteen times in a row (with an occasional 'she replied thrown in 'to spice things up').
I mean, I'm impressed that she managed to write the book. Its always impressive that somebody can sit down and just write away for such a long time. I have trouble doing it (which is the primary reason that I'm not a very good writer), but tenacity does not make up for talent.
But then, of course, I might be completely wrong and this book might soar to the top of the charts as one of the best books about nothing ever written (it wouldn't be first time that happened).
Still, seeing Liana go cross eyed is only entertaining for so long. Especially when she starts venting (and I get to be her proverbial punching bag). I better try and help her get this thing out of the way, cause its turning into a bit of a cat in a bag metaphor, where Banana is the cat and our apartment is the bag.
'When you think you have snake in bag, but are not sure, putting hand in bag is worst way to find out.'
Evolution of Enjoyment
Another monday. They seem to roll around a lot more often then we would like, aye? Friday evening rolls around, then suddenly it is Monday again, without the propper time to enjoy the two days in between. It's funny how that happens. How two days in the working week can be far too long and two days of not working end up being far too short.
I wish that when we were put together (be it through evolution or otherwise) that somebody somewhere would have gone, 'yeah, but hey. Shouldn't we make time pass more slowly when they're having fun? That way we might find that they actually have the time to enjoy it!' Instead we're stuck with an unfair situation where when we have fun time goes by too quickly and when we're bored out of our wits time goes by at a crawl. It's as if somebody designed things to work this way, just to annoy the piss out of us.
Maybe that is one of the best proofs of higher intelligence so far. After all, evolution would dictate that we would be far better of if time went more slowly when we had fun, so that we would need less fun to manage. In that we would be able to do more work (which would bother us less) and therefore our survival chances as a species would be increased.
After all, evolution is all about efficiency, right? Making one species more efficient than another and, in that way, to have the more efficient species outperform the less efficient one. An ability to function better by getting more out of our enjoyment would be more efficient, ergo sum, that would have a higher chance of survival.
Maybe we have learned to get more out of less enjoyment. I wonder if people in prehistoric times needed to have more fun to get the same amount of enjoyment? I mean, we definitely work a lot now. More then when we were hunter gatherers. That's been proven, our work week went up very steeply when we embraced agriculture (thats one of the big questions marks that anthropologists have about agriculture. Why did we start doing agriculture when it required us to work so much more then it did before?)
I mean, granted, life expectancy went up, survival chances went up, you didn't have to relocate every other month, etc. But those are not advantages that are immediatly obvious when somebody says to you 'hey, want to force the land into growing the plants that we want it to grow?' I mean, lets be honest about it, hunting down and killing an animal takes less time, is more exciting and is much tastier then growing, lets see, carrots.
Of course it was probably a far more gradual process. Like the witch doctor started taking along the plants that heal and growing them in the new place they moved to. Then he added a few eddible plants that the tribe really like (like lollipop trees) and soon he had an apprentice that was only busy growing plants, because he wasn't very clever and couldn't learn the healing art, or hunt. Then a meager summer comes along and all the tribes that didn't have this type of small scale farming going on died out, so more land is available for the qausi agricultural society and thus they spread out.
Slowly more people get into farming (specialisation) and less people go hunting. They can settle down long term in one location (as they form less of a strain on the animal population) and can therefore start making their settlement more permanent and more secure from harsh winters, tough predators and other tribes. Population expands and more groups move away, being able to subsist on less then other tribes and therefore being more efficient.
So people might then have learned to gain more enjoyment in less time. (alcohol was probably invented around this time as well, after all food needs storage and food storage is the perfect situation for fermentation.) Maybe thats something that we're getting better and better at all the time.
Maybe you could even measure that from one generation to the next. After all, we spend less time doing one thing now, then before. People grow bored with the same thing more quickly then before. Maybe that's because we have learned to get more intense enjoyment out of it?
I don't know, but somebody should find out.
Roleplaying reduex
Yesterday I finally managed to get a couple of people together for a role playing game. It's been well over four years that I've managed to do that, so it was a treat.
For those of you that are unfamiliar with what a role playing game (RPG) is, it is basically a group of people that come together and try to tell a story together. One player, called the GM or DM (Game Master or Dungeon Master) has the role of the 'story', while the rest of the players (called players) play the main characters in that story.
Before you think you run around and act out what your characters do, no that isn't it at all. Instead you sit around comfortably, sipping wine or beer and tell each other what your character is doing inside the game.
Normally a RPG is set in a fantasy setting, so it does involve killing monsters and dealing with trouble. Yesterday the group (consisting of only two players, unfortunately. Hopefully next week we'll have three) tried to help out with a brigand problem that is causing major havoc to the king of the small kingdom of Greymist.
Yes, I am a nerd. I secretly suspect that you had already realised this. I'm just slightly more gifted at hiding it then others (ok, I'm not, I would just like to think I am, happy?). The entire fun for me in roleplaying is getting to do things that you normally cannot do. How often do you get to be the hero, save the girl and slay the big evil bad guy? How often can you pickpocket the big fat arrogant merchant? Where else can you experience the thrill of adventure without the discomfort of sleeping outdoors, eating bad food and getting bitten by scary insects?
It is escapeism, to a certain degree. But its cheap, doesn't require a computer and even Banana Superhero Girl enjoyed it.
Why am I justifying my roleplaying hobby? I guess I unconsciously do, because I know how many wierdos get into it and what the general population think of the hobby. It is a bit looked down upon, what with all the bad press the hobby got in the late eighties.
Anyway, it was good to roleplay again. It was a bit of a struggle for all of us to get back into it (first time for Banana, so even more of a struggle for her), but it started clicking at the end. Next week we go at it again and hopefully we'll enjoy it even more.
You can have a lot of fun in reality, but sometimes you have to step outside of it to experience a thrill that reality can't really offer. Something to do with our mortality, I imagine.
Perspective
In Singapore there is no minimum salary. In Australia there is. What does this mean? Well, over the last few months I've had the privileged of finding out. (minimum salary is where the government says 'this is the minimum amount that you can pay somebody.)
I don't think many 'normal' people have really taken the time to truly think about the question of minimum salary and what it means for an economy. I mean they have thought about it in the way of 'minimum salary is good for those that make little money' or 'minimum salary is bad because it does not allow complete freedom for the market' and more of that distracted philosophical and meta economical mumbling, but how many have realised the impact is has had on their own lives?
Well I have moved from a country where there is no minimum salary (singapore) to one where there is a pretty high one (Australia) and I have noticed some very interesting and disturbing things.
I used to be strongly pro minimum salary and still am, actually. Yet I've found there are some aspects of minimum salary which are actually quite harmful for the society.
Yes, minimum salary helps those people that would earn below it or previously did earn below it. For those people minimum salary is certainly very advantageous. By raising the bar these people earn more and therefore have more to spend. Yet here is the interesting question, who gets harmed most by a rise in minimum salary?
Most people would say 'the rich' or 'the companies', but I think they might be wrong. Who I think gets hurt most by minimum salary is those people that were just a tiny bit above that salary before it was installed or were right on the dot. These people would experience no income rise.
So why would they be harmed? That is easy enough to explain. Because they would have to pay more for everything. Especially for products that are normally very cheap (i.e. food). They would have to pay more because in the end the only way that a company can make the extra money to pay for the new minimum salary is by raising the prices of its products. This rise isn't very much, but is most noticeable on cheap products that you buy a lot of, such as food.
The rich don't really suffer, because they only spend a very small percentage of their disposable income on these types of products (rich or poor the quantity of food doesn't really change much). Those that were just above the minimum wage though don't earn any extra money and need a large chunk of their income to buy these types of cheap products. For them a rise in prices is far more noticeable and painful.
That is why foodstuff in Perth is so much more expensive then in Singapore. In Singapore they dare make people work for near to nothing, over here that is illegal. So over here we need to pay for the minimum wages of the truck driver, the shelfer, the check out girl, the fruit picker and the security guard.
Don't get me wrong, I'm still for minimum wages. They come back in other ways (i.e. the poor have more spending capital to spend on things like food) and mean that the not so well of can still lead a decent life. But still, being stuck in a situation where you can feel the minimum wage and the high tax rates eating away at the little bit of the money you're making and you do start feeling a little different about these types of things.
Stepping backwards, from second to first.
I do miss having daily free access to the Internet. When I was in Singapore I used to spend at least two hours a day catching up on what was happening around the world. Over here I barely find time to read the newspaper (partially because the local newspapers are absolutely terrible). I miss that.
I just spent some time exploring some of my former preferred pages. Including
Slate magazine and
the Economist and it was nice to find out what has changed over the last four months in the world (a lot and nothing, for those of you that are interested).
The thing that struck me most, however, wasn't the news articles and the stories out there, but their method of delivery. Or rather, what struck me was how many people still did not regularly use and read what is out there. I imagine more then ninety percent has little to no idea about information revolution that is taking place right under their noses and just down the road. These people have no clue or understanding as to what is happening and why.
When I skim the surface of the Internet, as I have done today (it takes a hell of a lot of time to delve deeper) I have an opportunity to follow what ever link or string of information that I find interesting, thereby expanding my knowledge by accessing blogs, specialised sites and more within minutes off each other, without doing anything more then clicking a mouse and hitting a few keys.
For those literate in Internet (It pretty much is becoming a language, isn't it?) there is such a wealth of information (that does have to be separated from the dross, I realise) that to the Internet illiterate must almost seem mystic.
I notice it so much more over here then I did in Singapore. In Singapore anybody that was under thirty and had even the slightest ambition was Int Lit. Over here it is only the very few and far between that really use the Internet.
It is that, in a way, that makes this place one of the most backwards First World Cities in the world that I have ever been to. There is an information revolution going on and these people here are about as aware of it and interested in it as a starving child in Africa is aware and interested in the satellites that zoom over his head.
It suddenly becomes a whole lot easier to understand why people like Bush can be reelected. It's not because people are stupid, or don't want to listen, but rather because so many millions are not even aware that there is more to hear, or where to hear it.
Dream, dream, dream
We're thinking about planning everything to make certain we get our asses to Sri Lanka in November. If we work real hard then we might be able to have enough money saved up to hide away there for a while. That would be great. Travel around on the cheap and see a beautiful country, where they could certainly use the extra money from our travels, what with the Tsunami and all.
Liana Banana Superhero girl is going to try and make some sort of plan, with what we need to do and how. Ultimately we would want to be down there long enough so that we could go to Europe in the spring, yet still have enough money to set up once we get to Europe (traveling around Europe is financial suicide, unless you can work there as well.)
That would mean raising enough money to spend from the end of November to the beginning of April with little or no work. Of course on the up side, we would be in a third world country, where things would be cheap and affordable.
Now that I'm sitting here, I'm suddenly remembering that I also wanted to go see India, so maybe we can do both Sri Lanka and India in that time. India is possibly even cheaper, if you do it on a shoe string. With people living like kings for about 20 dollars a day.
I traveled through Thailand for about that much a couple of years ago, but I do have to say I was willing to put up with some very cheap and unsanitary alternatives. It might take a bit of time to work myself down to the same type of acceptance, I imagine. But, on the other hand, that might be really good for me. Getting back to grips with what I really need and want to make me happy.
It would be really good to put on a backpack again and just travel around, with the biggest concern in my head being keeping to the budget and remembering which of the hovels is mine.
Enjoying, and I mean really enjoying a shower because it has been the first proper shower in close to two months (the rest of your washing being done with buckets and sea water). Lying in a hammock for an entire day and only getting up out of it because your bladder is about to rupture and spill urine back into your stomach.
Eating food in a roadside stall (make sure its busy) and discussing with the others if anybody will get sick from it this time and making bets about who it will be.
Waking up in the morning and rolling out of bed, into your swimmies and then into the sea.
Yeah, that would be good. Now to make those dreams into a reality.
Far away places
Went over to Banana's sister's house (better known as Fish) and spent out time annoying the kids/being annoyed by the kids and watching movies. Thats become a bit of special treat for us, what with us not even having TV for a couple of months there.
We watched 'Better by the dozen', 'Hotel Rwanda', 'Million Dollar Baby' and half of 'Gold Member' (not in that specific order). Of those movies I would have to advise you all to take the time to watch hotel Rwanda. It discussed the war in Rwanda from a perspective of the actual African people and how they coped with the war. I'm not exactly sure if it is a true story (it doesn't say so anywhere, but it does act like it) but even if it isn't, it is still a good movie that had banana in tears on two occasions.
Not only does it tell about the plight of the people of Rwanda, but it also shows how little the west actually cares about humanitarian missions. They back out to let a million people be slaughtered, refusing to help the people, while elsewhere they raise the humanitarian flag high for a handful of life, because they only have their own interests at heart.
A repetition of that happened last year, where the people of Iraq were liberated from a stable, though not very friendly regime, even while nobody did anything to help the millions of refugees being hunted down and shot in Sudan.
In some cases the humanitarian flag has just become another banner for war mongering and another Causus Beli for those that wish to conquer the lands of their neighbours.
I have to agree with the Americans. The UN has become an ineffective and blunted tool. Not because of the reasons they give, however, but because their funding makes them too vulnerable to blackmail from member countries. How can you be objective when the threat of blackmail hangs over your head all the time?
I bet you can guess who funds the UN the most, right? Thats right, the Americans. Even with the Iraqi war as illegal as it was the UN gave barely a peep. Kofi Annan, the head of the UN and the only one to make clear that he didn't agree, is now being investigated for fraud and a conflict of interest (because of his son's actions). I think the entire UN has a conflict of interests.
But I seem to have drifted off topic a bit here. We had a lot of fun with Fish and Co. and Hotel Rwanda is definitely a movie worth seeing.
Growing pains
My dad sent me some money for my birthday (it's a bit hard to really send anything else, and the banks are accommodating in that way) so yesterday we had pizza and beer. That was pretty good, we hadn't had pizza in far too long, (two months, maybe more?).
Feeling very groggy today, though. Very annoying, I don't much like feeling groggy. It wasn't all that special of a night, so I am left wondering 'why am I feeling this way and why is my wallet feeling that way'. Sometimes you splash out and have no trouble with it. Other
times you go 'doh, wish I had considered matters slightly more carefully'.
Of course I still believe in my maxim 'if you have a problem either deal with it or accept it, everything else is whinging'. So, since I can do absolutely nothing about it, I might as well just accept it and make sure I don't do it next time.
A bit too much money flowing through my fingers. I can't help but notice that I'm still not very good with money. I think I was always at a disadvantage in that regard, however. Both my parents splurge often. My mom in a controlled, calculated way to improve her life,
while my dad just impulse buys as often as he can.
Nature and Nurture are against me on this one, so I guess I should be pleased with as far as I've gotten.
That reminds me of that story where a woman investigated and explored the lives of these really poor people in America somewhere. She basically spent a long time living with them in the edge of the burbs (I think they were Mexican, or something like that).
These people would sometimes get windfalls (like inheritance, lottery prizes or bonuses) yet the money would not improve their standard of living at all. The money would just disappear between them and their extended family, for things that weren't really necessary. (i.e. a
bigger TV when they already had one, or a night out for the boys, these people, this woman found, were not just poor because they didn't make a lot of money, but also because they chose to misspend their money when they got it. Their revenue was low, while their costs where high (to put it in economic terms). If they would have dropped their costs down then they would potentially have improved their status, but instead they wasted the money, while lamenting their fate.
I wonder if I'm like that? I wonder if I'm bad at managing my money? Directly a few people around me here in Australia jump to mind who are a hell of a lot worse, so I guess there is still hope for me. Still am I that bad? I sit here thinking about it and have to say 'not too bad'. For instance, banana and myself have been very good at keeping money physically tucked away, without feeling we have to spend it. We're improving, so thats good.
I imagine we could get better, but then do we want to? Do we want to eventually turn into misers that consider their money more important than their fun. I guess its a balance. How much of my money do I stick towards the future and how much do I put into enjoying the moment? When I left Singapore I would probably said nothing and all. Now I've grown a bit more careful. I remember how we arrived here and how we struggled and can't help but shudder. 'Not again' is what I said when it happened and I'll stick by that. So things have changed. Oh no, I'm growing up.
These people, this woman found, were not just poor because they didn't make a lot of money, but also because they chose to misspend their money when they got it. Their revenue was low, while their costs where high (to put it in economic terms). If they would have dropped their costs down then they would potentially have improved their status, but instead they wasted the money, while lamenting their fate.
I wonder if I'm like that? I wonder if I'm bad at managing my money? Directly a few people around me here in Australia jump to mind who are a hell of a lot worse, so I guess there is still hope for me. Still am I that bad? I sit here thinking about it and have to say 'not too
bad'. For instance, banana and myself have been very good at keeping money physically tucked away, without feeling we have to spend it. We're improving, so thats good.
I imagine we could get better, but then do we want to? Do we want to eventually turn into misers that consider their money more important than their fun. I guess its a balance. How much of my money do I stick towards the future and how much do I put into enjoying the moment? When I left Singapore I would probably said nothing and all. Now I've grown a bit more careful.
I remember how we arrived here and how we struggled and can't help but shudder. 'Not again' is what I said when it happened and I'll stick by that. So things have changed.
Oh no, I'm growing up.
Curve Ball
So, of course, nothing happened last night. That's the nature of the beast. When you expect life to treat you one way, it can't help but gniffle into its fist and treat you completely differently.
Not that I mind, after all life wouldn't be any fun if it were predictable (ok, it wouldn't be any fun for me, I have no idea about how you guys feel about it.)
Instead it was a relatively boring evening, where we did get a little bit of champagne for walking backwards and forwards once, so it wasn't all bad. Met a model there who used to be in Singapore when I was there. She is studying here now, so it was kind of fun to catch up.
For the rest it was mainly waiting, smoking cigarettes and looking at new models without any experience acting nervous as hell (there were about twenty five models or so in the room and at least three or four of them had never ever appeared in a 'show' of any kind before, so they were almost shitting themselves. It made me feel so old.)
The audience mainly consisted of friends and family of the new models. Though I imagine there might have been the occasional client among the audience. It was basically an amateuristic affair, dressed up with red bull and champagne.
Still, I didn't have anything better to do on my Tuesday night, with Banana Super Hero girl off teaching and I can always hope that the exposure reaps some sort of benefit.
Not that I'm counting on it. I think my modeling days are pretty much over and I need to accept that as fact. Unless i get my ass to somewhere bigger, I'm going to grow to look less and less like my pictures and less and less likely to actually land some more work.
The only thing regrettable about that is the potential money.
For the rest things haven't changed much. Still don't have a second part time job, though my first job has expanded slightly. I'm now helping edit texts for future products that the company wants to sell. Something slightly more up my alley, I believe. All I've got to do now is make sure that more of the work keeps coming my way. Then I'll feel a little happier and a little more secure in my job.
My posts have become very mundane, off late, haven't they? I guess that's because I need to spend so much time concentrating on the mundane. If things go well I'll soon be expounding about more lofty topics, so stay tuned.
apprehension
As I sit here writing this I feel the critters of nervousness gnawing at the walls of my stomach. Tonight I have a general casting where my agency invites all their clients and potential clients down to look at all their models and potential models. That, in itself, does not frighten me. I've been to enough of these castings that I know how to handle myself at these types of events and provoke the reaction that I want.
What has me by the balls, so to speak, is that I had a shoot done when I first came here and I still 'owe' the Photographer 160 dollars for that. Let me tell you the whole story (from my perspective anyway).
When I first came to Perth I went to an agency and asked if they were interested in representing me. They were, and this came straight from the lips of the head booker (the person that basically runs the agency.) Then I told them, flat out, that I didn't have any money to let them take the standard roll of film of me. I had come here with very little money in my pocket and did not have the resources to pay for this kind of thing.
That's alright, they said, we will pay for the shoot. We think that you're going to do well and we're willing to forward that money. You'll just pay it back through work. That, I personally thought, was very cool (stop me if you've heard this story already).
So we arranged everything for the shoot and I went down to the agency a few days before the shoot. Then they tried to arrange a hair appointment for me. They wanted me to pay for that and I said 'sorry, I can't. I just simply do not have the money'. They were slightly annoyed, but accepted that as the simple truth. They did not offer to pay for that. Fair enough, I thought.
So the shoot happened, despite me ugly hair and the agency did indeed pay for it. Then I showed up a week later and they showed me the contact sheet. These, they said, are the pictures that we want to enlarge and use for your com card. Cool, I said, you guys know more about this then I do, so go ahead.
Then I came back and they told me I owed the photographer 160 dollars for the prints. I sat there, stunned, mumbled something and then walked out.
that was about a month ago and I still haven't paid him. In fact, I've decided I won't pay them, since I had made clear on numerous occasions that I did not and do not have the money to pay for any of that. Nor did they tell me that I would have to pay for that. I haven't told them this yet and expect that it will probably come to a head tonight.
I will tell them, then, that I will pay the photographer with money I make from working for the agency. That, I have decided, is fair (though I can't believe that a roll of film, a photographer and a stylist can cost around three hundred dollars).
What I'm afraid of is that they won't let me stay for the casting and thereby destroy my chances of doing any modeling work over here. Though I don't like doing it, I do have to admit that it can pay pretty damned well, if you can get the work.
Of course I haven't gotten any because the agency does not seem to have pushed me at all (I've had one casting, so far, and one show that used all the models from the agency, anyway. That does not sound like they are pushing me, does it? I had to go to castings every other day while I was in Singapore.)
So that's the story. Now that I've typed it out I actually don't feel as apprehensive as I did when I started this post, so I guess thats a benefit. Tell me if you think I'm right in doing what I'm doing, yeah?
Down Under
Fourth of April, 2005. The day that will go down in history as the day I turned twenty six. (well, my personal history, anyway. Even if the rest of the world doesn't give a damn, it has still gone down in history).
Twenty six times around the sun, twenty six nearly circular journeys through our solar system, twenty six months of Aries, twenty six candles, twenty six birthdays. 9464 non-birthdays, alla Alice in wonderland (though the mad hatter was unfortunately lacking).
We celebrated my birthday in proper ausie style, with a bbq on Saturday. We started off the celebrations at 1 o'clock in the afternoon and had a pretty steady stream of people moving in and out for the next 13 hours or so. That's the good thing about having a communal court yard, people can't avoid you unless they want to hide indoors all day.
We had two meat session (meat!) and more booze then you could point a stick at (though admittedly, we didn't really have it to point sticks at). Then we went out and annoyed the locals with our banter and beer drinking ways. Truth be told, the locals didn't seem too bothered, seeing as they were out doing exactly the same thing.
We were damned lucky, as the weather had been pretty shit for the last week. Gusting wind, accompanied by a fifteen degree temperature drop had made the Friday (the day before Saturday) one of the coldest in Australia this year and about the coldest I had experienced in about four (I hate the cold). We had almost called off the barby and decided to do it all inside, but something somewhere favoured us and made the sun peep out from behind the clouds at about twelve and had us stretched out around the courtyard like so many felines with their spot in the sun.
It was a good day and though it cost us a fair bundle, I don't regret splashing out this once. Sometimes we have to spend a bit of money, just to remind us what we do it all for. (Or rather, to remind us what we all shouldn't be doing it for, namely money).
I looked down upon it, and I saw it was good.
The down is always followed by the up and through I don't know how high we will fly, I do feel positive about our chances and our prospects. It's about bloody time, too.
It's always good to feel up on your birthday. Actually, it is always good to feel up, period. I think I'll leave it with that. Probably not the greatest nugget of wisdom to date, but hey.
PS: I'm greatful to see that many of you still take the time to check up on my Blog every so often. It's nice to be remembered, so thanks to you Knight of Pentacles and to you Patricea. May you get back what you give out when you most need it.
Ketchup
After two months of absence I guess everybody has floated away to other destinations. Serves me right, of course, I can't really expect people to stick around for months as I say nothing and remain quite. Oh well, all I can hope for is that you all check back every so often in fond remembrance.
In the mean time I'll continue talking about what I've been doing. Lets start at my last post before the silence. Basically I was still complaining then off how things were horrible and I had no work and all that. Well, the silence was basically caused because then I found work.
I ended up trying to get people to sign up for charities on the street. It was hard work, normally about twelve hours a day, but I needed to grab at any log that could keep me afloat. I spent about a month working my butt of doing that. Ended up being promoted, becoming a leader with the right to start setting up my own team (I would have made commisions off of every sale that the people I trained made as well as I what I continued to sell for myself.)
After about a week of that I gave it up. I got scolded for saying something to somebody on the street and realised that I would never be able to keep my big fat mouth shut. Nor, for that matter, did I want to. They were trying to change me and I had no desire to be changed. I like my honesty, even if other people don't, and I wasn't about to drop that simply to make a few more sales and offend a few less people.
So I told them, that same day, that I was out. Left the field, went to the office and gave them back their stuff. The boss, some young guy of 24 who was a very skilled speaker but still a guy of twenty four, couldn't help but try to place some below the belt shots, when I left. That just helped to reinforce that that really wasn't the industry for me. Making money of other people's charity just didn't really sit all that well with me, and his personal focus on the money, rather then the humanitarian side of things ended up crushing any motivation that remained.
It was his friendly and open behavior that had first drawn me in and then the glimpses of his greed and egocentric behavior that ended up pushing me away again.
Basically, as I'm typing this, I find that I let myself be conned by a sales man. Fortunately, I managed to walk away with my dignity intact and enough money in my pocket to look for work elsewhere.
Find it, I did, but more about that when I next get a chance to post (probably monday, or so).
